Get ready to laugh with these super funny hippo jokes and puns! They’re big, silly, and perfect for anyone who loves animals or just wants to smile. These jokes are great for kids and adults, and they’re full of fun and easy words. So sit back and enjoy—these hippo jokes will bring you jumbo-sized laughs!
Hippo Jokes
Why don’t hippos use elevators?
Because they like to take the stairs, slowly!
What music do hippos like?
Loud music that makes the ground shake!
Why did the hippo carry a ladder to the pond?
He heard the water was very deep!
What do you call a hippo who dances?
A twirling hippo!
Why do hippos work as guards?
Because they look big and strong!
What game do hippos like?
Hide and splash!
Why don’t hippos whisper in water?
The water tells on them!
What did the hippo say to the tiny bug?
“If you bite me, I’ll sit on you!”
What’s a hippo’s favorite drink?
Cold muddy water with bubbles!
Why did the hippo leave yoga class?
Too much mud on the mat!
How do hippos stay fit?
They dance in the water!
What’s a funny hippo called?
A joke-o-potamus!
Why did the hippo fail his driving test?
He swam through the road!
What’s a hippo’s favorite trip?
Anywhere with lots of plants to eat!
Why can’t hippos play cards well?
They laugh too much when they bluff!
What happens when a hippo sings?
People get wet in the front row!
How do you know a hippo’s in your fridge?
The door won’t close and food is missing!
Why did the hippo make a podcast?
He had a lot to say with a big voice!
What dessert do hippos like?
Cold pond ice cream!
How do hippos show they like someone?
They splash and smile!
What’s a hippo’s favorite game?
A muddy board game!
Why didn’t the hippo race the cheetah?
He only runs when he’s hungry!
What did the hippo say at the museum?
“This picture looks just like my pond!”
Why was the hippo late?
He took a nap in the mud!
What do you call a hippo with style?
A cool-po!
What school subject do hippos like?
The one where they give opinions!
Why did the hippo start baking?
To make tasty mud pies!
How do you make a hippo happy?
Give it a hug and spray some water!
What’s in a hippo’s diary?
“Today, another bird sat on me. That’s fine.”
How do hippos go online?
With a splash-net!
Why don’t hippos like fast food?
They like to eat slowly and a lot!
What happened when the hippo played music?
The tuba got jealous!
Why did the hippo write poems?
He liked words and rhythm!
What do you call a hippo in a hammock?
A nap-o-potamus!
What did the baby hippo say after swimming?
“This is the best day ever!”
Funny Hippo Jokes
Why did the hippo carry a bag to the mud?
He thought he was going on a vacation!
What kind of music do hippos like?
Loud and heavy—just like them!
Why don’t hippos use Facebook?
They don’t like people watching them… unless it’s lunchtime.
What did the hippo say after eating a big dinner?
“Hmm, what’s for dessert?”
Why did the hippo start a radio show?
So he could finally talk about that elephant he doesn’t like.
How do hippos stay cool in summer?
They take mud baths and call it “hippo air conditioning.”
What do you call a hippo in fancy clothes?
A classy chonky.
Why did the hippo go to a counselor?
He felt too deep—like a swamp.
What’s a hippo’s favorite game?
Hungry Hungry Me!
Why can’t hippos be spies?
Because they can’t hide behind anything.
How do hippos buy stuff?
They pay with “hippo dollars”—they’re big and slow like them!
Why was the hippo kicked out of yoga?
He kept making new poses like “flat flop.”
What movie do hippos watch on date night?
50 Shades of Mud.
Why did the hippo get a bakery job?
He’s great with dough—and eating it.
What did the hippo tell the mirror?
“You look stuffed today!”
How do hippos text?
With one hoof… and lots of snacks in between.
What car does a hippo drive?
A big one—with mud tires.
What’s hippo-size portion control?
Eating only half the watermelon.
How do hippos party?
With mud cake and splashes!
Why did the hippo want to be an actor?
He already looks like part of the scenery!
What did the hippo do on holiday?
Laid in mud and called it “relaxing.”
Why did the hippo bring a ladder to the swamp?
So he could nap even higher.
What exercise does a hippo love?
Chewing.
Why don’t hippos play hide and seek?
You can hear their belly rumble from miles away.
What snack does a hippo like?
Everything they see.
What do you call a singing hippo?
A hippopopstar!
Why did the hippo fail art class?
He painted with mud… every time.
How do you make a lazy hippo move?
You don’t. You wait… forever.
What did the hippo say on stage?
“I’m not big, I’m just built for naps.”
Why don’t hippos dance on stage?
They break the floor!
What’s inside a hippo’s journal?
“Woke up. Ate. Swam. Ate more. Nap.”
Why did the buffet kick the hippo out?
He brought a floatie and filled it with food!
What job does a hippo dream of?
Lying down and getting paid.
Why did the hippo cross the road?
He smelled fresh mud on the other side.
Hippo Jokes And Riddles
Why did the hippo wear floaties?
So he could look cool while splashing in the mud!
Why don’t hippos borrow money?
Because they always forget to give it back!
What’s a hippo’s favorite kind of weather?
Rainy days—so they can play in the mud!
Why did the hippo bring a spoon to the river?
He thought it was a giant bowl of soup!
How does a hippo write a love note?
With muddy footprints and a big smile.
Why did the hippo sing in the choir?
Because he had the deepest voice of all!
What sport do hippos like most?
Jumping into mud puddles!
How do you make a hippo laugh?
Tell a funny joke and give him a treat!
What do hippos use to clean their teeth?
A big stick and a lot of hope!
Why did the hippo open a pie shop?
To sell his favorite treat—mud pies!
What kind of books do hippos read?
Big ones with thick pages and happy endings!
Why was the hippo always late?
He got stuck in the mud again!
What did the little hippo say at dinner?
“Does this have mud in it?”
Why did the hippo dance at the zoo?
Because he slipped on a banana and kept dancing!
How do hippos take pictures?
With a waterproof camera—and lots of splashing!
Where does a hippo go on vacation?
To a big pool with snacks and no rules!
What did the hippo say when he found his sandwich?
“Oh! I was sitting on it!”
Why do hippos love the mud?
Because it’s soft, cool, and fun to roll in!
What do you get when a hippo and a duck play together?
A very wet and noisy puddle!
Why don’t hippos wear tight pants?
Because nothing fits a belly that big!
Why did the hippo shout in the library?
He thought it was a shouting contest!
What do hippos eat on toast?
Jelly and sometimes a little bit of grass!
Why did the hippo become a magician?
He could make snacks disappear fast!
What show do hippos like on TV?
The one with lots of mud and silly animals!
Why don’t hippos take elevators?
They prefer sliding in the mud!
What’s a hippo’s favorite kind of math?
The kind that includes pie!
What does a hippo wear to a wedding?
A bow tie and his biggest smile!
Why was the hippo good at video games?
He sat on the controller and still won!
What happened when the hippo sat on the remote?
Every channel changed at the same time!
Why did the hippo work at the gift shop?
To squeeze all the stuffed toys!
What do you call a hippo who runs fast?
A stomper with speed!
Why was the hippo staring at the fridge?
He saw his own face and thought it was food time again!
What do hippos do at bedtime?
Snore so loud that frogs cover their ears!
Cute Hippo Jokes
Why did the baby hippo bring a pillow to the pond?
Because he wanted to take a cozy nap!
What did the hippo call her little backpack?
A cuddle bag!
Why did the hippo get embarrassed at the zoo?
Someone called her “super cute!”
What’s a hippo’s favorite ice cream?
Mud Fudge!
Why did the hippo wear a bow tie?
Because he had a fancy event to attend!
What did the baby hippo say after his bath?
“I’m too clean… where’s my mud?”
Why did the hippo sit in the flowers?
He wanted to smell nice!
Why was the hippo hugging a rock?
She thought it was her cousin!
What song does a hippo sing before bed?
“Mud Night, Sleepy Light.”
Why did the hippo laugh in her sleep?
She was dreaming of marshmallow frogs!
What’s a hippo’s favorite snack?
Cucumber sandwiches with some mud!
Why did the hippo hide in a bush?
He wanted to surprise his butterfly friend!
What do you call a hippo who loves to cuddle?
A snuggle hippo!
Why did the hippo bring a teddy bear to lunch?
Because it was picnic day!
How did the hippo say hello to the fish?
He waved his big ears!
Why did the hippo wear socks?
Because his feet got squishy in the swamp!
What’s a hippo’s favorite bedtime story?
The Little Mud Puddle That Could.
Why did the hippo sit under the tree?
He was waiting for a leaf to fall into his mouth!
What do you call a hippo dance?
The wiggle dance!
Why did the hippo paint his toenails green?
To play hide-and-seek in the grass!
Why did the hippo build a fort?
To have a tea party with frogs and ducklings!
What did the hippo bring to show-and-tell?
A pebble he named “Squishy.”
Why did the hippo hum all day?
Because he had a fun tune stuck in his head!
What did the hippo say when it started to rain?
“Yay! More mud!”
Why was the hippo proud of his belly?
Because it makes the best splashes!
What kind of shoes do hippos wear?
None! They like feeling the squish of the ground.
Why did the hippo wear a sunhat?
To keep his ears cool!
What did the hippo say to the baby duck?
“You may be small, but you’re full of energy!”
Why did the hippo love bubble baths?
Because popping bubbles made him laugh!
Why did the hippo whisper to the moon?
He didn’t want to wake the turtles!
What do hippos dream about?
Fluffy marshmallow clouds!
Why did the hippo start a garden?
To grow snack-flowers!
Why did the hippo wear mittens?
He wanted to be cozy while splashing around!
What do you call a hippo who gives great hugs?
A hug-hippo!
Hippo Puns
Hippos are so hip—they love playing in the mud!
I’m feeling a little hippo-critical today.
That hippo sure knows how to throw a muddy party!
When the hippo became an artist, his paintings were all about mud.
I hippo-lieve everything is going to turn out fine.
Stop being so hippo-critical—just enjoy the mud!
That hippo has a big splash of personality!
The hippo entered a belly flop contest at the pool!
This swamp party is hippo-tastic!
He’s a true hippo-timus prime of mud lovers.
Hippos are always ready to have a floppy good time!
You can’t hippo-lly ignore how cute they are!
The zoo is hippo-tized by his charm!
That hippo’s dance moves are totally hippo-nomical!
Let’s hippo-nize this moment with some fun!
She has a hippo-sized heart and always helps others.
The hippo made a splash at the talent show with his dance moves!
Don’t be a hippo-crite—everyone deserves to play in the mud!
You hippo-ly make me laugh all the time!
The hippo’s laugh is hippo-tent—it spreads everywhere!
The zoo keeper said, “Hippo at the ready!” before feeding time.
She’s the hippo-thetical winner of the race.
You’ve got hippo-tential to be amazing!
It’s hard to hippo-tize the swamp when it’s this muddy!
You hippo-nize everything and make it so fun!
The hippo’s style is hippo-nificent!
It’s time to hippo-rize your day with some good vibes!
I’m feeling a little hippo-bolic today—let’s have some fun!
The hippo loves to hippo-tate everyone with his big smile.
That hippo’s hippo-sphere of friends is huge!
He’s the hippo-gram of relaxation.
Let’s make some hippo-storic memories together!
This mud puddle is perfect to hippo-fy your day!
I’ve got a hippo-sized craving for adventure!
You hippo-ly make everyone’s day better!
